CARNAL NATION

Overall: The Magician
Challenge: 10 of Whips
Homework: 5 of Whips

Ouch! That ouch is not an ‘I like pain ouch’ but the feeling you’re getting that things are just not going your way lately. Overall, this is the month that really can make a difference, but you need to make a concerted effort to get through all the shit that’s holding you back. If it makes you feel any better, this is the worst it is going to be. Whether it is something as simple as a never-ending cold that leaves you weak and libido-less or as complex as a relationship that will just not die, this is the month to take a deep look at what is holding you back. Your homework is to take a good hard look at yourself. Have you been an asshole to someone or have you been on the receiving end of someone’s sharp tongue?  In either case, it is time to put all of your fears and pain to rest. This is the month to create a new you. You’ve learned your lessons the hard way. Now it’s time to make room for living and joy.  

Overall: The Empress
Challenge: Ace of Whips
Homework: The Devil

We all like being treated like a queen, and this month it is your turn to be put on the throne. Suddenly you are the vision of beauty and desire to everyone in your life. You get showered with gifts and attention. Your creative sexual juices are going into overtime, and you love every minute of it. Work with it, Crabbie. It doesn’t come around all that often. Fabulous, you say? Well, yes, it is. Just remember to get what you want, you need to put it out there that you want it. You cannot expect everyone to read your filthy mind and know what crazy fantasies you harbor. Share them. Really nothing seems to be too naughty this month. This fabulous month comes with a little small print warning though: Be careful of what you ask for because you will most likely get it and it could end up being an expensive addiction when someone else takes your throne from you.

Overall: Page of Vibrators
Challenge: 8 of Paddles
Homework: 10 of Paddles

Your motto might as well be hard work pays off. You are going to have an amazingly productive and fulfilling month ahead. Be a little impulsive. Take a road trip with someone you have the hots for, and get some action in at the rest stops. Stop worrying about having everything be perfect. Sex is about being spontaneous and learning along the way. It is fantastic to be good at a sexual skill, but that ‘roll the tongue, quick nibble’ trick might actually get boring the hundredth time you’ve done it. Seriously, you can’t do anything wrong this month, so go ahead and try something new. Before you know it you can add that hip roll move you learned at the rest stop to your hot skills list. Have a great month.
 

Overall: The Tower
Challenge: 6 of Paddles
Homework: 10 of Fantasies

We all have that proverbial closet that we shove shit in when we don’t want to deal with it. Well, this month, the rod breaks, and all the crap comes tumbling out. It is time to sort through the mess. What do you want to keep? What gets thrown in the trash? No one likes it when things fall apart, but it usually happens for a good reason. Maybe it’s time for you to reevaluate your relationship and decide what isn’t working any longer. The important thing to remember is to respect and focus on the good things. It is easier to hire a maid than to get bent out of shape over your partner’s sloppy nature. Point out the things that work, and get rid of the crap that doesn’t serve you any longer. Really, once that closet is cleaned out, you will have plenty of room for wonderful new things. By the end of the month, things will return to being fabulous and not frightening. Don’t you love being reborn?
 

Overall: Wheel of Fortune
Challenge: 2 of Paddles
Homework: Master of Vibrators

Why is it that the word change scares most Capricorns? Maybe it is because when it comes to our own lives, we are such control freaks that change is our natural enemy. Not this month. Not only is change upon us, but we are welcoming it with open arms. For whatever reason, things are on the upswing this month. Sex is better; relationships are improving; and life is harmoniously shifting in a new direction. Finally. This is the month to really put your self out there. Imagine the possibilities when you place that personal ad and you get hundreds of responses. If there was a month to take a risk, this is it! You can go back to being responsible and in control next month. This is the month to get your freak on.
 

Overall: 3 of Paddles
Challenge: The Hanged Man
Homework: The Lovers

You’ve cleaned the house, reorganized your closet, and added shackle clips to your bed all in anticipation of the hot lay you have coming into town next week. What happens?  They get called to a conference on the other side of the country, and your date gets postponed. It could be worse. The unfortunate news is you are on your own for a week or two; the good news is that they are worth waiting for. So this may not be your exact scenario, but the overall theme is the same. You put in a lot of work and effort to get things rolling, but, for whatever reason, the outcome is being delayed. Use the opportunity to make sure everything is where you want it to be. Take a look at things from a different perspective. Put yourself into your partner’s shoes and see what they see. Unless you plan on inviting your ex to have a threesome with you and your new hottie, I would take down that photo on your nightstand. By the end of the month, things should be full steam ahead.