No upstanding white leftist guy wants to call a middle-aged black woman an asshole, at least not publicly, but…well….
Alveda King, niece of Dr. Martin Luther, had this to say when she recently spoke at a National Organization for Marriage rally:
Christ on a bike, what an asshole.
Asshole asshole asshole.
Now, we all know there are serious threats to African-American families. Poverty, lack of health care, out-of-wedlock births to too-young mothers, absent fathers, infant mortality, HIV. But apparently the absolutely worst threat to the continuation of the race is RuPaul. Maybe Wanda Sykes, too, though few people (except the victims in Basic Instinct) seem to regard lesbians with the same end-of-civilization-as-we-know-it terror that cocksucking men evoke.
Of course, the "genocide" rant would be laughable—after all, the rally attracted something like 20 supporters—except that it's not. King, a self-styled "doctor," has also spoken of abortion as a genocidal plot against blacks, so it's pretty clear that by using such a loaded term, rather than "the suicide of the human race," she's implying that white queers (aided and abetted by black quislings like, um. James Baldwin, Lorraine Hansberry, and MLK's right-hand man, Bayard Rustin) are out to destroy the black community by any means necessary—even loving, committed relationships.
Talk about your slippery slopes! Gay marriage is not only a precursor to wedding your mother, all her sisters, and your Saint Bernard, it's the crucial step toward ending heterosexuality itself, toward the very extinction of the human race. What global warming and Mothra couldn't do will be achieved through the exchange of rings between Adam and Steve!
King is hardly alone in these lunatic paranoias, either. One online poster (and sorry, I can't find the site anymore) argued that homosexuality was to be shunned because if two gay guys were marooned on a desert island, they would be unable to populate the place. Of course, two straight guys couldn't do it either, while a het couple would give rise to a middle-of-the-ocean brood of inbred idiots, sorta like the poster himself. But hey, I'm discovering that rational thought is really, really, really not homophobes' strong point.
Okay, on the abortion-as-genocide thing, King is not certifiably insane. Black women do terminate pregnancies at a higher rate than their white counterparts, and many of the reasons they choose to do so have to do with the effects of racism. Still, it's hard for me, optimistic honky that I am, to imagine that Josef Mengele's office staff is hiding in the basement of Planned Parenthood. And by insisting that black women are not making rational life decisions, but getting abortions because Whitey wants 'em to, you're removing agency from African-American females, which seems kinda racist, at least to me.
But same-sex marriage leading toward extinction? One can only believe that outcome if one feels that homosexuality is such an attractive option, indeed, so superior to het pair bonding, that, given half a chance, Spike Lee will dump his wife Tonya and settle down with Denzel.
Sure, I somewhat blindly assume that sex is probably going to be better with someone who understands first-hand what feels good to a dick. (I've had fun frolics, though, with FTMs, so I may well be wrong.) But not even in my most gay-supremacist fantasies have I imagined that the hetero family is such a thoroughgoing bummer that its victims just can't wait to get out, even if it means homo sapiens will go the way of the dodo. Maybe "Dr." King knows something I don't?
It is perhaps germane to note that King, before she started shoving Jesus down our throats, got a couple of abortions and a divorce. As the Clash so pithily put it, "He who fucks nuns will later join the Church."
It might also be noted that when King spoke at Glenn Beck's August 28th faith-based clusterfuck on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial—the one that appropriated the anniversary of MLK's "I had a dream" speech—she explained that she was doing so because "Glenn says there is one human race, I agree with him. We are not here to divide. I'm about unity." Presumably, she's about irony, as well.
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