CARNAL NATION

Who would have thought that you can't write off prostitutes and pornography as health expenses on your income tax? If that comes as a shock to you, you have something in common with William Halby, a 78-year-old tax attorney from Brooklyn. Halby tried to claim that $108,000 he paid for visits to prostitutes, $7,000 spent on porn and sex therapy books, and $5,000 in charges for loans to cover the above all constituted deductible expenses that were directly related to his health. The IRS, strangely enough, disagreed. Somewhat strenuously, in fact. The opinion of the IRS (which was just backed up by a federal judge), is that Halby owes $21,000 in back taxes, plus $4,000 in penalties.

To his credit, Halby was very precise about his expenditures. He kept a log of dates, names of the service providers, and amount spent, although he apparently lacked the receipts to back up all of his expenses.

Although Halby claimed that he should be able to write off the prostitutes, books, and equipment because of "the positive health effects of sex therapy," the court noted that Halby had not had the "treatments" prescribed by a doctor, nor had he consulted with any medical professionals afterward "to determine their impact on his health." Not to mention that there's that embarrassing little detail of prostitution being illegal in New York, something that former Governor Eliot Spitzer could surely have explained to him, given the opportunity.